My name is Katie, and I have voluntarily involved grandparents. I don’t take this privilege lightly, of course. My mom is a text away if I need to run a quick errand. They’re always willing to take my daughter for a night if I feel burned out and overwhelmed. Plus, they love her. She is their entire world. They are voluntarily and happily involved in my daughter’s life. They love being grandparents.

One mom would say that my situation is the “ultimate flex” when it comes to being a parent.

“It isn’t the mom car, not how much you make a year. It’s not how well-behaved your kids are. The biggest flex is having involved grandparents. Voluntarily involved. Holy shipples,” TikTok mom Kelsey (@kelsey_p90) says in her viral video.

“Having that midday struggle with my children and then getting that text from grandma: ‘Hey, can I pick so-and-so up for a sleepover tonight?’ Funny you should say that. Her bag has been-been-backed and never unpacked it. She’s ready!” she jokes.

“Nothing beats it. Nothing beats a grandparent that wants to do more than required to get that yearly Facebook ‘Happy Birthday’ Grandma post. You know what I’m talking about? They want to go above and beyond.”

Kelsey also points out that her situation with involved grandparents is not the norm.

“The worst part is…it’s kind of not common. You hear a lot of the time, so people don’t have help and I-I am sorry. That fucking blows. We know it’s that, so we know it. Who doesn’t want to be involved with their grandchildren? Who? Anyways, I digress. I know it’s true. Having the village actually involved. Top tier. Winning,” she concludes.

Several social media users understood where Kelsey was coming from, sharing their own grandparent situations ranging from totally involved to nowhere to be found.

“I find it interesting that my mom always had me and my brother with our grandparents. Weeks, summers, spring break… and yet, she isn’t the kind of grandparent that she so heavily relied on. She never takes my son, no sleep overs, I had to ask her to babysit and she shows up late and leaves early,” one user said.

“100% I’ve never been a jealous person but when someone says “I’ll just drop them off at my parents” I go into a rage of jealousy,” another admitted.

Another shared, “Never realized how lucky our family is that every single grand parent wants to be as involved as possible. We see all grand parents every week – not in an annoying way in a I am here to help (while we work) or come watch them practice sports or stop by to team them said sports on other days or whatever we need. Its lovely.”

Research shows that having involved grandparents is a mutually beneficial relationship. Studies have shown that children who have close bonds with their grandparents are less likely to experience depression as adults, and have a better understanding of themselves and their parent. Studies have also investigated the effect of becoming a grandparent on well-being. Longitudinal data suggests that the transition into grandparenthood can have a positive effect on well-being.